Random thoughts(Music)

I'm sitting in a chair at my piano teachers house . I'm waiting for my time to play . I arrived early as usual , i always like to be on time . There's an old man playing ''besame moucho''. He plays with difficulty and slowly which reminds me of myself when i first started to play.
It's funny how amazing music can make you feel . It's a different world , a strange connection to a magical place . It also reminds me of an incident that occur a few days ago.I was in the bus and a lady probably in her 50s was sitting across from me . She was staring outside the window and when we passed throught a big building which seemed to me like a corporation,she started to smile widely which made me question what crossed her mind at that moment . What ever it was,for a strange reason,it made me think about music.

One year ago it was my first piano lesson ever with the person who changed me completly . She is by far the best teacher i ever had . Typically me , being nervous for my piano exams next saturday , i panicked and she said the most beautiful things about my progression that i've ever heard . Music is my life . I play for a total of 3 and a half years in particular 1 year with a teacher . And i managed to be ready for a diploma. I feel so proud about myself and i believe in me for the first time . I know that i usually write posts about other stuff but i just wanted to post this one . To remember this specific day and how happy i feel and proud about myself . And even though people can't understand my craze about music , i'm overflowing with hapiness . My hero, my savior,my whole life, my everything, the one thing i know for fact it won't betray me and it'll always be here to ease the pain.

Forever Young?

It's a typical wednesday night full of liabilites. I decided to take a break. I was scrolling through tumblr when i came across a post talking about the melancholia of growing up.
No one can deny it,time passes by extremely fast,it's not something you can control.. you will grow up.. you will die..
Ever since i was a little kid i used to find myself in a perpetual fear about death with my mom always standing by my side reassuring me that everything is going to be okay. I can't explain why but i guess we all feel a little bit scared sometimes mainly about how many time we've left,how many minutes,hours,days until we die.Perhaps my biggest fear isn't death but the thought of not staying forever young...
They say '' nothing ventured,nothing gained''.I personally haven't figure out how to be spontaneous and careless but i try to do so everyday. By thinking negatively i only exacerbate the situation. But those few seconds that your heart is pounding really fast by the fear of the unknown,the inevitable end,oh they frighten me so much. You try to alleviate the pain by restricting your mind.  Consequently you cry  then you perk up. Because life is beautiful. Even though youth seems to be like a fairytale it wouldn't make sense if changes didn't occur. Life would be boring and miserable, there wouldn't be any progress or spiritual growth..
Therefore you should try to be a better person every single day,to appreciate what you have and to gave to those in need. Don't stress out about work and every once in a while venture into something...travel the whole world on a whim with your loved ones..say the things you want to say .. and always be proud of yourself.

Loneliness vs Solitude

I was always fascinated by the way human brain is constructed. Although i'm a sports science student,i've attended a lot of psychology classes and i'm actually thinking on doing my master in counselling maybe even clinical psychology. You should've figure it out by my previous posts that i really like to get deep into conversations with my self and to philosophize everything.
Today the weather is melancholic.. it's raining and as a typical 21st century ''hipster'' i decided to drink my coffee in my balcony while reading a book . In this particular book the author talked about loneliness vs solitude. Even though i'm a lonely soul and in love with the idea of spending time with my self,i've never thought the meaning behind those two words.
So i did a little research on the internet. Turns out loneliness is a state were your brain things negatively about basically every aspect of your life. You feel alone,hopeless even if you're surrounded by people. It's that feeling where you wanna scream in a big crowd but you feel that no one is paying attention and no one is able to hear your pain.
On the other hand solitude refers to a more positive attitude. A springboard to greater self-awareness, a state where an individual is happy to be alone,thinking and arranging everything. I like to contend with the idea that essentially solitude leads to creativity. I've wrote somewhere in a previous post that the greatest composers composed their symphonies under a negatively state of thinking. That was before i realize that they actually might be under a solitude state .
What i've learned today is that loneliness is not the same as solitude. Loneliness can be the beginning but solitude will be and  must be the final destination. Sometimes we all need a little time alone to think,recharge and start again. So everytime you see someone walking in the park alone or sitting alone at a table for two, do not judge or criticize them . They're in a solitude state of mind and you should be too.