FoodForThought : Growing Up

Have you ever thought about how your age affects everything in your life? Growing up was always a huge issue for me even when I was an adolescent or even younger. You see, many  anticipate to get older, live their life to the fullest and be free from responsibilities or their parents ''chains''. And very often, a few years after you've reached your goal and you made it through your adult life you realize  that life literally gives you hell. Why is that? Why were you so interested in growing up so fast?
The things that always came to mind when I was thinking about being an adult was responsibilities. I hated that word so much. Being an adult means you have to follow the norm, you have to have a job, pay taxes, have little or less time to see people you love and even when you do find the time to communicate and connect,you are out of energy. Sure this is the reasonable way of growing and I understood that clearly like I understand it now. However, that doesn't mean that I necessarily like it.  That is because when you have a certain responsibility to something or someone that automatically means that some other aspects of your life will be affective (like I mentioned before less energy, little time to see friends etc. ). Some say that if one wants to see someone or call someone no matter what their schedule is , then one will always find time and effort to do so. I completely disagree and here is why. Supposedly you are an over thinker like me , or a person who is frightened by time, death and in general adulthood. When you are in this state of mind the only thing that comes through your head is disaster. Disaster to this, disaster to that and the list goes on and you over think and over react about everything. You are definitely making a list of all the things that will go wrong while you grow up and the thing is that you are mostly right. Inevitably you are in a world of your own and unwilling to communicate with anyone.

When I come to this state where I am scared and lost to my own thoughts I try to be calm and accept the facts by following some simple steps.
First and foremost, I try to understand that everything that starts in life has an end including a human life. Once I accept the fact that eventually everyone will die at the end I try to hold on into my dreams and the things that I want to achieve in the future. Growing up means fulfilling your dreams, but it also means that your life reaches an end line,which is inevitable.

Secondly, I try to hold on to my good memories of vacation, funny accidents etc. When you've reached a point in your life when you would truly wish to just pause the moment forever,try to understand that even if it was possible eventually you would get bored. You are a human being, you want the change even if it frightens you a lot.

Last but not least, every age has its own perks and drawbacks. Sure it is amazing when you are an adolescent. You're only problems are homework, girlfriends/boyfriends and other not so important issues. Think of all the other possibilities you can achieve when you are an adult. You can become a pro at a musical instrument and eventually be a famous artist . You can be a teacher, a doctor , a writer , whatever you want. If you ''stuck'' at a certain point of your life or a certain age you won't have any progress at all.


Growing up means learning new things, accepting and overcoming obstacles and just moving on . Even though I would literally die to stay forever young , deep down I know that I would simply be at the same spot all the time because I wouldn't have the opportunities to move forward. And moving forward is a great start to reach your dreams, to reach success.  

FoodForThought-Things we need to give up in order to be happy

There is a very intriguing facebook page called "Higher Perspective". I discovered it one day by accident when i saw an interesting video that one of my facebook friends had posted through this page. This video was my food for thought. So let's go ahead and elaborate on some tips that the creators of this page suggest that we should give up in order to be happy.

1 Dwelling on the past
We have all been told not to stay focused on the past. When I was feeling frustrated about something that had happened my loved ones always used this sentence. At the time I was not able to pay close attention and see that they were right. Dwelling on the past can only do you harm because we are talking about things,situations,events that had already happened and we can not change them even if we are talking about a breakup or even death.

2 Worrying about the future
Personally, I am one of those people who are constantly thinking about their future. Unfortunately,in this way,we are missing out on so many things that happen in our lives currently. Whether there is a God out there or not, worrying about things that you can not control in the future will only destroy your mental stability. Not forget to mention about the severe anxiety that you will be facing every single day. When life is hard and you are having a bad day try to relax and do things that calm your soul.

3 Negative Self talk
Nobody can deny the fact that negativity flows into our veins every single day. Some people might be more pessimist than others and I strongly believe that it has to do with their traits and their experience. The key is to accept the fact that there is not a single thing in this world that it is perfect including ourselves. We all have features that we do not like though that does not mean that they are not appealing to others. We are all beautiful and unique.

4 The need to impress others
It is in our nature to boast about certain things and try to impress others. Sometimes we even lie not only to others but most importantly, to ourselves. If a person is happy with her choices then she won't have to boast about anything or try to impress anyone because she would simply be focused on her work and her personal achievements.

5 The need to always be right
There is a strange feeling that hunts me everytime  I am not right. I have not figured out yet if I am one of those people who always want to be right no matter what but i came to the conclusion that it is okay to make mistakes. Like i mentioned before a person should not feel the need to impress anyone or be right  all the time. We learn from our mistakes and become stronger.

6 Restistance to change
I won't lie and i will admit that change frightens me a lot. When I finished highschool I was whining about entering at my university. After a few months I found myself overflown of  happiness, I was so thankful that I left school. About a month ago I graduated from college and now, I found myself scared to the thought that I am working because my life has simply changed yet again. But development is in our nature along with change and it is something that we should all accept. It is not in our hands to change it anyway, and personally, inaction is my worst enemy.


7 Blaming others
When an incident occurs or even worse, when we are not sattisfied with a choice that we took, we tend to blame everything on others . Taking responsibility for our actions will only improve us in a way that we will be more true not only to ourselves but also to others.

Overall, there are many ways that an individual can achieve happiness and there are many things that one should eliminate from her life in order to be happy. This post was inspired by a certain video and I am only referring to certain tips from the creators of this video.  

FoodForThought- Insight vs methodically thinking

(nymag.com)

Random realizations seem to be extremely connected to success. An amazing example is for instance Archimedes,the ancient Greek mathematician who notice that the density of an object could be measured by the volume of water it displaced as soon as he settled in for a bath. 
The results of many studies indicate that when a person is trying really hard to solve a problem using a strategy rather than his or her insights,it is more likely to find the solution after a lot of hours and there's even the probability of an error at the results. So it turns out that we really do think brilliant thoughts in the shower. But that does not necessarily means that we have to shower in order to find inspiration or the solution to certain problems.
The message that is being hidden in the specific article is the following: in order to find inspiration and solution to problems one must be free,relaxed and lose control for a little bit. Give himself/herself a break including body,mind and soul. Rest is of the essence and even the greatest machines need a little break sometimes. The functionality along with the solutions to certain problems will come naturally without any strategies. But one must not forget that working with specific strategies is also essential but is not so highly connected to imagination and innovation.

Letting go

Letting go can be very tricky,very hard to deal with.. and most of the time it's a fight you got to face on your own. If you are lucky and you have the right people by your side you will be able to overcome what is that tortures you,other times you might find yourself in a world of your own for many reasons,either you don't want to open up about your problem or you think that nobody can understand you.
At this point you may ask..how can i let go? Let go of what hurts me,of what i secretly don't want to forget?Well here comes the serious and complicated stage of what i like to call it <<state of one's happiness>> I constantly seem to talk about happiness and how to achieve it and that is because i have been through numerous of bad situations and i finally figure out that indeed happiness is a state of mind , is something that you choose,something that you have to work hard everyday,it won't come to you free handed. Back to our main subject for this post. How to let go of what hurts you. Well personally i would suggest the following
1) Find the problem-the cause,define what is it exactly that you can't let go. Is it a person?Is it a memory? If it is a memory the only think i can assure you for a fact (at least based on my experience) is that it will eventually go away after a long period of time,it will drift apart while you are out and about,while your life changes because it will change nothing stays the same forever.
2)Are you willing to try and move forward or do you plainly complain about your pain without taking any actions ? You are a mess i know but it is intrinsic to let go,let go only if you want to. Otherwise by pushing yourself you won't get anything out of it,only hurt nothing more.Don't feel sad about how you feel or how much you've cried over and over again about this. Remind yourself constantly that everything happens for a reason and it is better to have experiences like this one,those setbacks will construct your new and powerful self.
3) Congratulations now you are in the final step or as i call it, <<the acceptance stage>>. You have awareness of what is going on and what is it that you really want to let go . On this stage you gonna have to talk with yourself for several hours. Analyze every single thing and see the advantages and the drawbacks you gained from this experience because that is what everything is ,an experience to make you stronger and open up your mind about everything.
A memory has the power that you fid it with. Even if the only thing that you want to do right know is sitting down and crying for days or eat your feeling in a vast box of chocolates you can't change the unchangeable fact.Time never ceases,it will continue even if you don't want it because your everyday routine eventually will change and you will change to,the only difference is that when you really want to let go you will achieve happiness earlier . If you are still struggling you may have to fight for just a little bit longer,but in the end you will survive and you will be you again . A new fierce and potent you!

Random thoughts(Music)

I'm sitting in a chair at my piano teachers house . I'm waiting for my time to play . I arrived early as usual , i always like to be on time . There's an old man playing ''besame moucho''. He plays with difficulty and slowly which reminds me of myself when i first started to play.
It's funny how amazing music can make you feel . It's a different world , a strange connection to a magical place . It also reminds me of an incident that occur a few days ago.I was in the bus and a lady probably in her 50s was sitting across from me . She was staring outside the window and when we passed throught a big building which seemed to me like a corporation,she started to smile widely which made me question what crossed her mind at that moment . What ever it was,for a strange reason,it made me think about music.

One year ago it was my first piano lesson ever with the person who changed me completly . She is by far the best teacher i ever had . Typically me , being nervous for my piano exams next saturday , i panicked and she said the most beautiful things about my progression that i've ever heard . Music is my life . I play for a total of 3 and a half years in particular 1 year with a teacher . And i managed to be ready for a diploma. I feel so proud about myself and i believe in me for the first time . I know that i usually write posts about other stuff but i just wanted to post this one . To remember this specific day and how happy i feel and proud about myself . And even though people can't understand my craze about music , i'm overflowing with hapiness . My hero, my savior,my whole life, my everything, the one thing i know for fact it won't betray me and it'll always be here to ease the pain.

Forever Young?

It's a typical wednesday night full of liabilites. I decided to take a break. I was scrolling through tumblr when i came across a post talking about the melancholia of growing up.
No one can deny it,time passes by extremely fast,it's not something you can control.. you will grow up.. you will die..
Ever since i was a little kid i used to find myself in a perpetual fear about death with my mom always standing by my side reassuring me that everything is going to be okay. I can't explain why but i guess we all feel a little bit scared sometimes mainly about how many time we've left,how many minutes,hours,days until we die.Perhaps my biggest fear isn't death but the thought of not staying forever young...
They say '' nothing ventured,nothing gained''.I personally haven't figure out how to be spontaneous and careless but i try to do so everyday. By thinking negatively i only exacerbate the situation. But those few seconds that your heart is pounding really fast by the fear of the unknown,the inevitable end,oh they frighten me so much. You try to alleviate the pain by restricting your mind.  Consequently you cry  then you perk up. Because life is beautiful. Even though youth seems to be like a fairytale it wouldn't make sense if changes didn't occur. Life would be boring and miserable, there wouldn't be any progress or spiritual growth..
Therefore you should try to be a better person every single day,to appreciate what you have and to gave to those in need. Don't stress out about work and every once in a while venture into something...travel the whole world on a whim with your loved ones..say the things you want to say .. and always be proud of yourself.

Loneliness vs Solitude

I was always fascinated by the way human brain is constructed. Although i'm a sports science student,i've attended a lot of psychology classes and i'm actually thinking on doing my master in counselling maybe even clinical psychology. You should've figure it out by my previous posts that i really like to get deep into conversations with my self and to philosophize everything.
Today the weather is melancholic.. it's raining and as a typical 21st century ''hipster'' i decided to drink my coffee in my balcony while reading a book . In this particular book the author talked about loneliness vs solitude. Even though i'm a lonely soul and in love with the idea of spending time with my self,i've never thought the meaning behind those two words.
So i did a little research on the internet. Turns out loneliness is a state were your brain things negatively about basically every aspect of your life. You feel alone,hopeless even if you're surrounded by people. It's that feeling where you wanna scream in a big crowd but you feel that no one is paying attention and no one is able to hear your pain.
On the other hand solitude refers to a more positive attitude. A springboard to greater self-awareness, a state where an individual is happy to be alone,thinking and arranging everything. I like to contend with the idea that essentially solitude leads to creativity. I've wrote somewhere in a previous post that the greatest composers composed their symphonies under a negatively state of thinking. That was before i realize that they actually might be under a solitude state .
What i've learned today is that loneliness is not the same as solitude. Loneliness can be the beginning but solitude will be and  must be the final destination. Sometimes we all need a little time alone to think,recharge and start again. So everytime you see someone walking in the park alone or sitting alone at a table for two, do not judge or criticize them . They're in a solitude state of mind and you should be too.

Friends

Life has the habit of surprising us all the time. No matter who you are or where you're from,in your lifetime,you're gonna meet people that will change your life completely.
Among the back stabbing friendships that i had in my life so far, i was lucky enough to find true friendship that fed with love every bit of sadness in me. True happiness,laughter,overflows when you're with those special people and you cannot compare those gifted momentos with anything else in the world. You have a strange connection with them;you don't have to pretend to be someone else because they already know who you truly are and they don't care. They love everything about you even your flaws,even the things that you hate about your self;they are actually able to help you learn how to embrace your uniqueness because they love every crack of you. Everything you do in your daily life reminds you of them and sometimes you may find yourself laughing for no particular reason by just remembering something stupid that you did together or by seeing videos and photos of your adventures. And don't try to deny the fact that sometimes when you're in a different group of people you say by accident your inside jokes and nobody gets them because they are not them .
Deep down i know that i don't have the need to write about them especially here but life is too short and it never comes easy or as we want it to be. So i wanna dedicate this special post to them... the ones who made me realise that life is really important and no matter how many times you fail you gotta get up and try again. For sure life isn't easy but everything gets better when you have your friends by your side,when you know that you have someone special who will be there for you no matter what. Even if a friendship like this one get lost in the course of time i will forever remember the adventures and the absolute happiness that flooded me every second i was with them. And even if we lose touch completely i'll forever know that no one and i mean NO ONE is gonna make me so happy as they did.
Friends..they are your second family.. they are your whole life.. treat them well and never leave their side. They are much more important to you then you think.

Chase dreams

 

It's been a long time since i wrote a post here . For the past couple of months i had to deal with a lot of stuff.. Both silly and serious complications.. So it got me thinking about life .Tbh i was in my philosophical mood again tonight ...
Everything i've been through changed me . It changed the way i see life and the way i think about basically everything . It got me thinking a lot about time .. How fast it goes by. I remember when i was younger what my grandma used to say to me:'' Life is too short. Life is really really short.Live in the present,forget yesterday and make small plans for tomorrow.'' I wasn't able to understand what she was talking about. I was around 7-8 years old and still in school . Back then time seemed passing by so slow but now i sense it... Life is indeed very short. So we have to let go of our negative thoughts,we have to give up feeling hopeless everyday and start thinking about making our dreams come true. Otherwise one day we will wake up and feel regret for the opportunities we threw away . To give up your dreams is the worst mistake a human can do. Chase your dreams even if at the end you didn't make it . It's better to chase after a dream then to live a 'safe', normal, boring life .